Friday, December 10, 2004

Liberal Logic Dualities

1.) The war in Iraq is a mess; we should bring our troops home now!
2.) There aren't enough troops to win the war, we should send more!

1.) I voted for Kerry, who votes against funding for American soldiers in Iraq.
2.) Rumsfield is ill-equipping our troops!

1.) Kerry should've been President, the man who voted down a tafillion weapons systems.
2.) Why can't our armed forces get the equipment they need?!!?

1.) Bush is making the world hate us and fostering terrorism!
2.) My man was Clinton, who did nothing to thwart terrorism's advance in eight years in the White House.

1.) There were no WMDs!
2.) Bush's military let a cache of dangerous WMDs go unchecked and unguarded in Iraq, left to fall into the hands of terrorists!

1.) There were no WMDs!
2.) Sarin, mustard gas, nerve agents, biological weapons labs, clandestine nuclear programs, deceptively "halted" chemical weapons progams don't count.

1.) There was no basis for war!
2.) Sixteen U.N. resolutions were working, or at least the next one might've, or at least sanctions might've worked, or the inspectors may have been one day allowed to return to their work.

1.) The Administration was asleep at the switch and did nothing to preemptively prevent 9/11 from happening!
2.) The Administration rushed to war with Iraq without letting the threat from Saddam fully materialize!

1.) Saddam had absolutely no connection to al Qaeda or terrorists!
2.) Giving refuge and asylum to al Zarqawi doesn't count.

1.) Saddam had absolutely no connection to al Qaeda or terrorists!
2.) Giving refuge and asylum to Abbas doesn't count.

1.) Saddam had absolutely no connection to al Qaeda or terrorists!
2.) Paying $25,000 per Palestinian suicide attack on Israel doesn't count.

1.) Saddam had absolutely no connection to al Qaeda or terrorists!
2.) Terrorists training camps don't count.

1.) We should turn over the country of Iraq to Iraqis!
2.) These elections should be delayed; there's no way they'll work!

1.) The insurgents are not terrorists.
2.) Bush's military let a cache of dangerous WMDs go unchecked and unguarded in Iraq, left to fall into the hands of terrorists!

1.) War never solved anything!
2.) Thank God the slaves were freed, Europe was liberated from Hitler, and the U.S. gained independence from England.

1.) Bush went it alone without a U.N. war resolution!
2.) I have no problem with Clinton going it along in Kosovo, without a U.N. war resolution.

1.) We are morally obligated to stop the mass genocide in Kosovo and the Sudan
2.) Saddam never did anything to precipitate war (I'm looking the other way when you show me those pictures of mass graves, by the way).

1.) You must show us WMDS!
2.) I doubt Yugoslavia ever had any WMDs.

1.) Milosivic was a madman!
2.) Saddam was framed by a lying Bush!

1.) Haliburton was given a no-bid contract in Iraq...what horror!
2.) Haliburton was given a no-bid contract in Kosovo...so what?

1.) Republicans want to impose their views on us!
2.) If you don't accept my views, you're a bigot, a homophobe and a fascist!

1.) I should move to Canada!
2.) Hell no, I'm not moving to Canada...there's nothing up there!

1.) Republicans need to be more enlightened, open-minded and accepting of other people's views.
2.) Bush is a fascist. I hate Dick Cheney. Rush Limbaugh can go to Hell. Sean Hannity needs to shup the @#$% up!

1.) Outsourcing is traitorism!
2.) Let's see...how can we bribe Toyota to build a plant in Michigan?

1.) How can we elect a draft dodging coward into the White House for TWO terms!?
2.) Oh, how I pine for the days of William Jefferson Clinton.

1.) I may not support the war, but I wholeheartedly support the troops.
2.) Pat Tillman is an idiot who got what he signed up for.

1.) I am right on this issue.
2.) [insert anything at all here]

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2 Comments:

At December 10, 2004 at 2:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ralph,

Please see my answers below.

1.) The war in Iraq is a mess; we should bring our troops home now! While Ralph is correct in characterizing Iraq a disaster, Kerry never campaigned to bring the troops home "now." Others have, notably Michael Moore, but then again he isn't a policymaker.
2.) There aren't enough troops to win the war, we should send more! Kerry did in-fact promote the idea of increasing troop deployment in Iraq. As did John McCain (R-AZ). Kerry never suggested we cut-and-run. In fact, he voiced the opposite. His message in a nutshell was Bush got us into this quagmire and we have no choice but to see it through.
CONCLUSION: Ralph misleads.

1.) I voted for Kerry, who votes against funding for American soldiers in Iraq. You mean Bush understimated our need for body-armor at the time we went to war? No way! How could Bush leave a little thing like cost out of his decision to invade Iraq. The fact of the matter is, the $87 billion appropriations bill contained a host of items, including body armor. However, the bill didn't allow for line-item voting. It was either yes or no for the whole kit-n-cabootle (sp). At any rate, the bill passed so why are we still talking about a lack of body armor? Incidentally, body armor expense constituted less than 1/3 of 1 percent of the bill.
2.) Rumsfield is ill-equipping our troops! Ralph, back in my day, $87 billion used to buy a crap load of body armor and shields for humvees. The dollar just isn't as strong as it used to be (but that's another topic altogether - :-)

1.) Kerry should've been President, the man who voted down a tafillion weapons systems. Quiz: who said this, "Congress has let me cancel a few programs. But you've squabbled and sometimes bickered and horse-traded and ended up forcing me to spend money on weapons that don't fill a vital need in these times of tight budgets and new requirements. … You've directed me to buy more M-1s, F-14s, and F-16s—all great systems … but we have enough of them." Give up? DICK CHENEY! Why don't you remind your readers how Dick Cheney voted against the tafillion weapons systems also?
2.) Why can't our armed forces get the equipment they need?!!? That's a great question! In-fact, Armor Holding Co., the sole supplier of protective plates for the Humvee military vehicles used in Iraq, said it could increase output by as much as 22 percent per month with no investment. The only problem is, they're waiting for an order from the Army. It's a matter of physics indeed Mr. Defense Sec'y. The physics of getting off your ass and using the telephone!

1.) Bush is making the world hate us and fostering terrorism!
2.) My man was Clinton, who did nothing to thwart terrorism's advance in eight years in the White House.

1.) There were no WMDs! TRUE!
2.) Bush's military let a cache of dangerous WMDs go unchecked and unguarded in Iraq, left to fall into the hands of terrorists! WMDs = tons of dynamite? Hell, let's invade Home Depot!

1.) There were no WMDs!
2.) Sarin, mustard gas, nerve agents, biological weapons labs, clandestine nuclear programs, deceptively "halted" chemical weapons progams don't count. Hey, in addition to that bridge I'm going to sell you, can I interest you

1.) There was no basis for war!
2.) Sixteen U.N. resolutions were working, or at least the next one might've, or at least sanctions might've worked, or the inspectors may have been one day allowed to return to their work.

1.) The Administration was asleep at the switch and did nothing to preemptively prevent 9/11 from happening!
2.) The Administration rushed to war with Iraq without letting the threat from Saddam fully materialize!

1.) Saddam had absolutely no connection to al Qaeda or terrorists!
2.) Giving refuge and asylum to al Zarqawi doesn't count.

1.) Saddam had absolutely no connection to al Qaeda or terrorists!
2.) Giving refuge and asylum to Abbas doesn't count.

1.) Saddam had absolutely no connection to al Qaeda or terrorists!
2.) Paying $25,000 per Palestinian suicide attack on Israel doesn't count.

1.) Saddam had absolutely no connection to al Qaeda or terrorists!
2.) Terrorists training camps don't count.

1.) We should turn over the country of Iraq to Iraqis!
2.) These elections should be delayed; there's no way they'll work!

1.) The insurgents are not terrorists.
2.) Bush's military let a cache of dangerous WMDs go unchecked and unguarded in Iraq, left to fall into the hands of terrorists!

1.) War never solved anything!
2.) Thank God the slaves were freed, Europe was liberated from Hitler, and the U.S. gained independence from England.

1.) Bush went it alone without a U.N. war resolution!
2.) I have no problem with Clinton going it along in Kosovo, without a U.N. war resolution.

1.) We are morally obligated to stop the mass genocide in Kosovo and the Sudan
2.) Saddam never did anything to precipitate war (I'm looking the other way when you show me those pictures of mass graves, by the way).

1.) You must show us WMDS!
2.) I doubt Yugoslavia ever had any WMDs.

1.) Milosivic was a madman!
2.) Saddam was framed by a lying Bush!

1.) Haliburton was given a no-bid contract in Iraq...what horror!
2.) Haliburton was given a no-bid contract in Kosovo...so what?

1.) Republicans want to impose their views on us!
2.) If you don't accept my views, you're a bigot, a homophobe and a fascist!

1.) I should move to Canada!
2.) Hell no, I'm not moving to Canada...there's nothing up there!

1.) Republicans need to be more enlightened, open-minded and accepting of other people's views.
2.) Bush is a fascist. I hate Dick Cheney. Rush Limbaugh can go to Hell. Sean Hannity needs to shup the @#$% up!

1.) Outsourcing is traitorism!
2.) Let's see...how can we bribe Toyota to build a plant in Michigan?

1.) How can we elect a draft dodging coward into the White House for TWO terms!?
2.) Oh, how I pine for the days of William Jefferson Clinton.

1.) I may not support the war, but I wholeheartedly support the troops.
2.) Pat Tillman is an idiot who got what he signed up for.

 
At December 10, 2004 at 3:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry, busy with work so I was unable to finish the rest of my commentary. Will do so at the earliest opportunity. Thanks in advance.

 

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